Looking Forward

I look forward to the rest of my life with Julie at least as much as I’ve enjoyed the last 33 years with her!  There have been great times and very hard times, but we always managed to pull through together.

That’s what marriage is.  It’s commitment, not giving up, willingness to give in, and always looking ahead…not dwelling on past regrets and troubles.

Julie and I raised two daughters, had career changes, travels, and really great friends to share our lives with.  Age has slowed me down, and I know there will be challenges to face.  But I also look forward with hope to more good times; holding hands in the sun, maybe another trip or two, and who knows what else.  By God’s grace we will have many more years together!

I wrote another lyric with that optimism in mind.  Rick hasn’t been able to come up with music yet; after a lifetime of paying the piano, his arms are hurting him, and he needs his one day off each week to give them a rest.  It couldn’t possibly be a problem with my lyric, could it??

So here, with optimism and faith in God, is a lyrical look back to marriage and family as well as wondering, “What’s Next?”  If you missed yesterday’s entry, you can go back and hear the finished song that started us out 33 years ago!

My Jewel 2

She’s My Jewel

Jeff and Julie 031685

She’s My Jewel. That’s the title of the song of the night at our wedding reception 33 years ago today!

Happy anniversary, Julie!

My best friend and best man, Rick, and I had collaborated on a number of songs over the years; my lyrics and his music. If there was ever going to be a time when we needed to come up with something, my wedding was it!


Best man’s toast right before the song!

Rick’s real start was being part of the Bershire Boys Choir. They were in Leonard Bernstein’s original production of Mass to open the Kennedy Center in Washington D.C. Bernstein hand-picked Rick to perform the altar boy solo with Alan Titus. He graduated from the Interlochen Arts academy in northern Michigan, and was nick-named The Whiz at the New England Conservatory for his perfect pitch.


When I finished the lyrics and handed them off to him, I was nervous that inspiration might not hit. But hit it did!

In addition, he knew someone who had a professional recording studio in his house, complete with a state-of-the-art synthesizer. We were able to go well beyond recording on his dad’s reel to reel tape deck. We had strings, brass, percussion, chimes…the whole shmeer!

The opening verse was just Rick singing and keyboard. The second verse opened the song like a blooming rose as the chimes started the second verse. And it went on from there. On one take his voice cracked during the chorus, but it was at the perfect moment to add an emotional touch, so we kept it.

Yes, Rick sang the song, but given his resume’ and my voice, well…I’m sure you understand! He also arranged all parts and recorded them all on the synthesizer. It was a tour de force!

Rick was already playing professionally and had a professional Bose sound system. We set it up at the reception hall before going to the church. I spoke with the banquet manager, and explained the surprise we had in store. Right after the best man’s toast, he would hand me the microphone so I could introduce Julie’s song. I wanted the lights dimmed and all staff to leave the tables and stay in the back of the room. All attention was to be paid to my bride and her song!

The moment came. I started talking about the songs Rick and I had written and how there was something missing from our catalog; a song for my new wife, my Jewel.

Well, she cried. All the women at the tables cried. Even the waitresses cried!

I measured that night’s success in running mascara!



So what was it like? Really?? I finally did something I’ve meant to do for years; I took the original cassette tape to a studio and had it saved digitally. So here, to commemorate our 33rd wedding anniversary and for your listening pleasure, is She’s My Jewel!



And as they were eating, Jesus took bread, blessed and broke it, and gave it to the disciples and said, “Take, eat; this is My body.”   Matthew 26:26

Grad school in Detroit was a tough time. Our stipend was about $175 every two weeks, which wasn’t much to live on even in the early 80’s! My crock pot was my best friend for eating healthy and yet cheaply.

My weight hovered around 155 lbs., which is a bit thin for a guy who’s 5’10”! Most of us dropped a few pounds in those years!

MeatloafOne day I had a meatloaf with carrots, potatoes, and onions cooking in the pot. Cliff, another actor in the program, and I were talking, and he was rather down. I invited him over to share my meatloaf. It was kung-fu week on channel 50, and Cliff had a black belt in one of the martial arts.

He showed up that evening with a quart of ice cream and a pie! We pretty well destroyed the most everything that was prepared or brought over. We watched Bruce Lee, shared stories and ate.

That was one of my more memorable times from my years in Detroit.

Isn’t it interesting how so many important times revolve around food? Food is how we share bonds with others. I can’t think of a holiday that doesn’t involve food, whether hot dogs and baked beans, ham, colored eggs, or a glut of candy! Eating together brings us together. There is particular satisfaction in cooking food for others.

Should it be surprising that Jesus offered his very body and blood as a spiritual meal? We bond together with other Christians in sharing that meal. We bond with Christ Himself, who prepared it for us.

Thank God He invited us to His feast! Pray that He guides you to find others to invite to His table!



Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long upon the land which the Lord your God is giving you.   Exodus 20:12

ToddlerI worked as an assistant manager at a fast food chain when my girls were both toddlers. They were a high point of everyone’s day whenever Julie brought them in for a visit during my long shifts. They’d toddle in, and every one would coo over them and spoil them.

A high school girl who worked for me told me that she was going to a concert the coming weekend that her parents had forbidden her to attend. She told me about how she had a whole charade set up with her friend about staying at her house for a sleepover. She was giddy with anticipation for the concert and at her cleverness in attaining her goal.

I smiled and asked her how she liked my girls. Of course, she thought they were complete darlings! I frowned and said, “You know, if one of those innocent little girls ever grow up to deceive me the way you are planning to deceive your parents, I think it would just about kill me.” And I walked away.

She returned to work following the weekend, but I said nothing. She then took an opportunity to talk to me privately. She told me she didn’t go and thanked me for helping her make the right decision.

Bundle of JoyTry a mental exercise with me. Imagine your proud parents holding the little bundle of joy that was you. Somebody then gives them a TV that will play an A&E Biography episode of you warts and all. How do you suppose they would react?

Would they be sad at misfortunes in your life but proud at how well you coped? Would they swell with pride at your successes, only to be anguished by how you achieved them?

Would the way you conducted your life just kill them with grief or would they be proud of how you treated them and others regardless of your station in life? Would you have honored them with your life?

Would you have honored your heavenly Father?

Whether your parents are still alive or not, you understand what this is about, right? You might be blushing at how you’ve done so far, but don’t worry. If necessary and still possible, there’s still time to make your parents proud of you.

There is still time to make amends with your heavenly Father. There is still time to start mending your ways, to start doing everything better.

Pray. Ask Jesus to help you find your way, if you are lost. If, like me, you’ve done things that you still cringe at remembering, ask Him to help you let that go with His forgiveness. Ask Him to help you avoid any more of those.

When you fail again – and you will – Jesus will still be by your side, ready to forgive.

Christmas Birthday

Jesus Manger

Wait till they hear our story!

So it was, that while they were there, the days were completed for her to be delivered. And she brought forth her firstborn Son, and wrapped Him in swaddling cloths, and laid Him in a manger, because there was no room for them in the inn.    Luke 2:6-7 NKJV


I’m writing this on December 21, because today is my eldest daughter’s birthday.  Today’s Quote of the Day is the account of Mary giving birth and laying Jesus in a manger, and I realized I’ve never shared the tale of Hillary’s birth before.  It’s a tale worth telling!

Julie and I had gotten married the previous March 16, and, despite our carefully laid plans, she was with child much sooner than the several years we had planned to wait.

We eventually figured out what causes that sort of thing, but this particular cat was already out of the bag.

We had been in our apartment for the year and had just bought a house.  We wanted to be in it before Christmas and before Hillary was due a few days later.  The sellers wanted one more Christmas in their home before moving out.  Fortunately, Julie worked at our bank and the appraiser had a real thing for Toll House cookies.  Do the math.

Family and friends helped move the small stuff on December 20th while Julie was under strict orders to do nothing but supervise from a chair.  I had already changed over the utilities and shut the phone off at the apartment – this was before cell phones.

So we’re back at the apartment that evening, me exhausted from lifting and toting all day.  We roll into bed, shut off the light, and within minutes I hear, “Jeff?”


“I think my water just broke.”

“Ha, ha.  Go to sleep.”  Pause.

“I really think my water broke, Jeff.”

“Quit playing with me, Babe.  It’s been a long day.”

“But I…Oh!  Oooohh!”  Julie scrambled out of bed and headed to the bathroom.  I chased her and found her there, standing in the tub, water running down her legs from under her nightie.

Oh.  Good.

So with no phone, I have to drive 2 miles through an arriving snow storm to her parents to call the doctor and tell him to meet us at the hospital.  Then I zoom back to the apartment, expecting Julie to be dressed and ready to go.  I called for her, since I didn’t see her in the living room.



“Are you OK?”

“Just getting ready.”

Just getting ready?  What?  I walked down the hall to the bathroom and went in.  And there she was.  Getting ready.  By shaving her legs?


“Well, I’m not going to the hospital like this.”  She continued shaving.

Estrogen-based life form.  That’s all I could come up with.

Toledo Hospital

Yup; same place I was born

It turned into a very long night of induced labor and ended up with the OB taking me aside to say I needed to talk to her about a Caesarian.  Hillary was starting to show signs of distress, and things were getting ready to go south.  He wanted to get Hillary out before we got anywhere near that actually starting.


I knew Julie would be so disappointed after all of the time we spent in birthing classes, so I approached both her and the topic very gently.


“What?!?”  There was an edge there that scared me a little.

“I was just talking to the doctor, sweetie.  This has been going on for a while now.”  Her head came around, and her face squared up to mine.  I swear I could clearly read the words “No” in her right eye and “Shit” in her left.

“Well, the doc says that maybe this isn’t going to happen the way we planned.  He’s thinking we should maybe do a Caesarean before the baby goes into distress.”  She then spoke the words that I will never forget to my dying day, the stuff of legend and cocktail party stories.

“I don’t care!  Rip it out of me!”

Estrogen-based life form.

During the whole pregnancy I had laid my head on Julie’s stomach every night and said the same thing to our unborn child:

“Hey, there!  Mommy and I can’t wait to meet you.  I hope you’re doing well in there.  We both love you very much.”

So I visit the nursery to see Hillary after she’s cleaned up, wrapped in bankies, and lying in a bassinet.  She’s fussing pretty good, so I lean over her just as if she’s still in the womb to tell her it’s Daddy, and I love her very much.

She goes immediately quiet, cocks her head to listen, and then goes right to sleep.

What can I say?  I was a classically- trained actor with great vocal skills.

Monte Carlo

Two door, not family-friendly, but a 4-barrel carb streak of lightning!

Christmas morning I get to the hospital in our ’79 Monte Carlo, secure Hillary in the car seat in back and ease Julie into the front seat.  The city is still covered in snow, so I’m driving, oh, so carefully as we both monitor Hillary as best we can from the front seats.


Just a few blocks from the house, neither one of us can hear her breathing anymore, and we start being crazy parents, right?  We’re thinking she suddenly died; SIBSDS – Sudden Infant Back Seat Death Syndrome.

Well, of course, she’s just fine.  We bundle her into the house, calm ourselves, and sit altogether on the sofa, this brand new family of three.  Best Christmas gift ever!


Don’t forget to check out and order your copy of my Christmas novel, The Substance Hoped For!

Substance Cover

Christmas Memories

Christmas ShepherdsThen the shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things that they had heard and seen, as it was told them.   Luke 2:20

I started searching my memories of Christmas in childhood. I wasn’t sure what all might come to mind as I started making an effort to recall Christmases past. Here is what I came up with.

1950s Church clothes (2)

Circa 1950’s

I remember Wednesday evening Advent services. This was the 60’s when people still got dressed up to go to church. Even the Wednesday evenings Advent and Lenten services saw us making the effort to dress up to respect where we were heading. That’s one big difference! We’ve gone from Casual Fridays to Casual Always. This despite studies years ago that demonstrated that dressing down led to poorer work performance. It’s true that clothes really do make the man…or the woman as the case may be.


Dress up for church? That’s for Christian snobs who only come to show off. Or so they say. I was taught that it was about respect.

Wednesday attendance did not equal Sunday mornings, and that was to be expected, given people’s work schedules. Still, I remember the anticipation of every Wednesday, another candle lit on the Advent wreath, another week closer to Christmas!!

Toledo Hospital

But with a star on top

There were two ways to go home from church after an Advent service. I always begged my dad to drive straight up Parkside Boulevard coming home at night so I could see the Christmas star atop the Toledo Hospital on the far side of Ottawa Park. I was always disappointed if he decided to cut off onto Mt. Vernon, missing the sight of the star. That was always a big deal for me – seeing that star on the way home.


Christmas Eve was a bigger deal than Christmas Day, really. That’s when the church pulled out all the stops. We had a great music director, so there was the choir, trumpets, hand bells,…the whole shmeer!

There were the Christmas carols sung as we held candles in the lights-out sanctuary and tried not to flinch as the hot wax dripped on our hands. It was a spiritual event! I never felt so alive!

milk-and-cookies-for-santa-elena-elisseevaI remember a bona fide visit from Santa when I was very young. After Christmas Eve worship, my mom put out a few cookies on a paper plate with a glass of milk for the Big Man himself! I was astounded beyond measure the following morning to see an empty glass and crumbs of cookies on the paper plate. In addition to that, scrawled on the plate with a crayon, was “Thank you!”

Santa was really there, and I had the proof!

Santa faded over the years, but the majesty of a Christmas Service remained. Attendance went down. It went from having to show up early to avoid the folding metal chairs in the narthex to plenty of room in the sanctuary with space to spare.

Christmas morning never has held the spectacle of Christmas Eve, but I always enjoyed it.

I stopped going to most Christmas services quite a number of years ago. I know we’re supposed to welcome visitors with open arms and hearts, but the rudeness eventually outweighed the glory of it all. The last Christmas Eve I attended for several years was because a visitor walked across the very front of the sanctuary and cursed, loud as could be! With a huge smile he yelled, ”J**** Chr***, Bob! How the hell ya been?!?” Right in front of the alter. That was the pinnacle of rudeness and disrespect that had grown year after year.

Yeah, I’m a Christian snob, I guess, but I think guests or the twice-a-year crowd should at least act like guests and show a little respect for the place and the service. So, that was the last Christmas Eve service I went to for many years.

The first church I went to in Memphis actually voted to stop having Christmas morning services, since no one felt like going to church when there were so many presents to unwrap, so much food to eat.  *sigh*

christmastreeThis year I’m trying to make every Advent service. I plan to attend the Christmas Eve Festival Worship as well as Christmas morning. There are too many good memories to let the bad ruin it for me. It’s time to recapture the joy of what it’s all about. It’s time to…return, to rekindle the fonder memories and make a few new ones before any more time escapes me.


Christmas Class

I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service.   Romans 12:1


It isn’t just that He came…

It isn’t really about the gifts. It’s about commemorating Jesus’ birth. The gifts? Those are part of the celebration much like food. And even then, the food isn’t so much about the food as it is about sharing the celebration and being a community. It’s about how you do it at least as much as that you do it.


That applies to life in general, true?

I described this concept in In Doing It With Style in October of 2016. Short version; I found a young lady’s wallet in the parking lot at work. Instead of just tracking her down and handing it back, I quickly memorized some information from her driver’s license and made it look I ran into her randomly.

Wallet Return

Not really me

“I’m getting a name here. Are you Caitlyn?”


I acted like a psychic, telling her stuff I never should have known. After sufficiently freaking her out, the grand finale was telling her she recently lost something of great value.

“Oh, yeah. Your wallet.”

How do you spell “relief?”


My daughter takes care of horses at a stable. They recently got a new border; a nice filly who is a young girl’s Christmas present. My daughter’s equine education included how to braid manes for show horses. She bought some purple ribbon – the girl’s favorite color – to braid into the horse’s hair on Christmas Eve so the horse will be all fixed up for the girl’s surprise Christmas Day.

Here’s where my daughter really tugged at my heart and gave me a few tears. She said she’s doing this and always tries to do things like this because of all the times I made the extra effort to surprise her and her sister, to give them good memories.

Bicycle Store

So many choices!

Their favorite childhood memory? Their first “Big Girl” bicycles. That even comes in first – slightly – over their first overseas trip to London. Why?


The story is told in Enjoying Joy, but here’s the short version. They were still in grade school and only marginally big enough for adult-sized bicycles. It was a chancy proposition. We had to go to Toys R Us to get a birthday present, and I told them to stay by the bicycles and dream while Mom and I shopped.

I asked them when I returned if they found the bike of their dreams. Oh, yeah! Each stood proudly next to their ideal bicycle, knowing that the day to get it was far off. That’s when I told them to grab the ticket for each one. Today’s the day.

Faked ‘em out, but good!

That’s how Julie and I raised them; childhood is about memories. Bad ones happen too easily, but good ones take a little effort. It’s an effort that is oh, so worthwhile! How many kind deeds has my daughter done that I don’t know about besides this horse project?


The bike episode was a one-off for me. It was a fun gig. I had no clue it would turn out to be a life lesson!

So what are your Christmas plans? Are you going to celebrate with the mandatory presents and meals, complaining inside at how expensive this is, how much work it is, OR…are you going to do it with some class, some style? Are you going to rely on the price tag or the presentation? Will it be a signature on a card or something heartfelt, something personal?

In other words, are you going to commemorate Christ’s birth by giving of yourself as He did? Are you going to let price tags and Hallmark do your talking for you or are you going to give of yourself as Jesus did?

This year, celebrate Christmas with class!

Christmas Celebration

Christmas Light

Candle SingleThen Jesus spoke to them again, saying, “I am the light of the world. He who follows Me shall not walk in darkness, but have the light of life.”   John 8:12

I have struggled with Christmas in some years. I just didn’t feel that Christmas spirit. I wondered what went wrong. Misgivings have made this struggle more difficult in recent years. However, several things have coalesced in my mind that have given what, for me, is a sensible conclusion. I’m going to come at this from a few very different places, so try to bear with me.

I once read an article about how Christians can be deceived by wolves in sheep’s clothing. We can start doing ridiculous things just because “the church” has led us to them. Two big examples given were Christmas and Easter. The author wrote that Satan must be having a great laugh over how he’s managed to fool Christians into worshipping God on Satanic feast days.

That’s a concept I struggled with for years. What are we doing celebrating the birth of our Saviour on the feast day of that which He came to defeat?!? The same goes for Easter.

I struggled for years with loving the memories of the lights, the lightness of a true Christmas. My best friend and I from high school days would spend Christmas Eves going to church services around Toledo, hitting everything we could starting in the late afternoon and on to the midnight festival worship at my home church.

Christmas-Tree-Light in Darkness

Light in the Darkness

That last was spectacular. Precisely at midnight, as communion was being celebrated, the bell choir would ring everything they could get their hands on. It was an avalanche of bells falling from the loft, and the entire congregation would leap to their feet! The bells became the opening of “Joy to the World” and it was monumental! It felt like a beacon of sound and light in the dead of night.


Fast forward to today and another piece I very recently ran into regarding CERN and dark matter. And I promise I’ll make this as non-technical as I can. Here goes…

First, CERN runs a hadron supercollider for research into theoretical physics. They conduct what even Steve Hawking thinks are very dubious and dangerous experiments regarding anti-matter and the so-called God particle. If you want a bit more information, try my articles Weirdness at CERN and You Can’t Make This Up.

The difference between matter and anti-matter can be stated succinctly like this: matter does not easily ignite. Setting wood on fire requires building a certain configuration of kindling to get it going. A nuclear bomb requires several pounds to obtain the critical mass and exceptionally precise conditions are needed for an explosion.

Anti-matter, on the other hand, takes a great deal of effort and cost to contain and prevent it from exploding. Further, any explosion or combustion really is chaos writ large and complete.

A person has both dark and light energies in them. We can’t live in a material world without anti-matter/dark energy. A person is connected to both realms at the same time on the energy level. A person’s thoughts and feelings determines which energy they draw from.

Dark SpiritCERN has found out WHY paranormal activity exists. It’s a function of anti-matter/dark energy. Dark matter/energy affect our emotional state. It causes violent thoughts and behavior. It increases paranormal activity wherever it is accumulated. In fact, it is said they have even quantified how much dark matter/energy will cause someone to go berserk. Dark matter/energy attracts demonic entities.

Christmas Tree GoldenWhat all of this led me to think is that celebrating Christmas during the former feast times of the winter solstice is like planting a “Light Bomb” right on the enemy’s doorstep. Remember my description above of the midnight festival service at my home church. It was full of light, joyous sound, singing, and praise as we commemorated Jesus’ birth! It was a beacon of light amidst the darkest times of the year, a sure defense from the forces of darkness.

I invite you to discover Christmas anew this year, this first Wednesday of the Advent season. Don’t do it with toys. Don’t do it with spending money on things soon forgotten or broken.

Spend the next few weeks building your Christmas Light in your heart. Build it until you can join with others on Christmas Eve and set off another Light Bomb to drive darkness out of our lives with the joy only Jesus gives.


Chocolate Love

And the Lord spoke to Moses, saying: 23 “Speak to Aaron and his sons, saying, ‘This is the way you shall bless the children of Israel. Say to them:

24 “The Lord bless you and keep you; 25 The Lord make His face shine upon you, And be gracious to you; 26 The Lord lift up His countenance upon you, And give you peace.”’   Numbers 6:22-26

BenedictionWhen I used to conduct the liturgy at my home church back in Toledo, this benediction was my favorite part. It really is a thing of beauty, if you say it thoughtfully and slowly instead of ripping through it as so many pastors do.

Familiarity breeds, well, carelessness if not contempt.

So. How does God bless us, love us?

When I order a dessert, which is more often than my doctor approves of, it’s almost always something chocolate. Why? Pay close attention, because this is important!

FW0906FLB01Chocolate is one of the many ways God says, “I love you!”

I don’t have a copyright on that, so feel free to use it any time you want.

dark-choco-e2aChocolate SquaresIf God loves us so much that He gave us chocolate, who am I to turn away such a gift from my Lord and Saviour?

That isn’t the only thing, of course. There’s creation, which is a pretty awesome thing too.

Mind you, I don’t usually say something is awesome. The word is criminally overused and misapplied. Nail polish is not awesome. Cars are not awesome. What is awesome? The Grand Canyon, the Aurora Borealis, the Milky Way…

…and chocolate.

Milky Way

Isn’t there a constellation, The Chocolate Dipper?

God created everything just for us! That is not human pride or arrogance speaking. That’s humble surprise and gratitude. He made Eden for Adam and Eve to live in, the earth to put it on, the solar system for the earth, and all of the stars to tell times and seasons.

Now, I know that there are a handful of degenerates who are all part of some Commie plot and don’t like chocolate. God, however, tells us to pray for our enemies. I’m sure they have some sort of chocolate substitute, however substandard it might be. God loves even them!

Whether you are in harmony with the universe and love chocolate or are at least a bit deluded and don’t, please remember God loves all of us and has countless ways of showing it. What are the ways God loves you?

What wonderful, and perhaps wonderfully simple joys has God slipped into your life to say “I love you?”

Just remember that, running second only to salvation, is…

Chocolate Love!

Chocolate Assortment

…so little time

Sad. And Frustrated.

It’s been a rough week on a few fronts, and I’m feeling pretty upset.  I don’t usually vent here, but today I don’t think I can help myself.

Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him    1 John 2:15

Bad DriverI had a lot of driving time this week; well over 1000 miles.  Some days aren’t too bad, but Wednesday was horrible!  I had to get off the road before dinner time and call it a day.  Speed limits?  No one seems to have ever heard of them.  Tail-gating?  Standard operating procedure.  Cutting people off or simply swerving right into them…including two semi’s who were in the process of passing me?  Perfectly acceptable.  And I mean they still had a couple car lengths to go before being clear of me!

“Behold, I send you out as sheep in the midst of wolves. Therefore be wise as serpents and harmless as doves.    Matthew 10:16

I try to conduct my life in a moral and legal fashion.  I’m not perfect, but I really do try.  I’m supposed to be Jesus’ representative on earth and witness to him in word and deed.

LAAAWWWD, give me stren’th!!!”

White Collar Crimeand the cares of this world, the deceitfulness of riches, and the desires for other things entering in choke the word, and it becomes unfruitful.    Mark 4:19

Have I mentioned how thievery, dishonesty, and brazen extortion are now acceptable business practices?  No?  Well, they are!  Just get some behind the scenes exposure to the automotive aftermarket business and get back to me.

And this is the condemnation, that the light has come into the world, and men loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds were evil.    John 3:19

And they still love the darkness!  Love it?  The revel in it!!  There is no shame.

As long as I am in the world, I am the light of the world.    John 9:5

So when Jesus left, His light left with Him.  We are to be the light for Him now, but, oh, my if there isn’t a lot of darkness here!

satan BI will no longer talk much with you, for the ruler of this world is coming, and he has nothing in Me.    John 14:30

Coming?  He’s here.  Satan has been doing his thing since right after The Beginning.  He’s been steadily ramping up his game.  The state of things now are such that we wouldn’t have believed things would be like this if we had been told 20 years ago.

Most assuredly, I say to you that you will weep and lament, but the world will rejoice; and you will be sorrowful, but your sorrow will be turned into joy.    John 16:20

Well, I guess He told me this was gonna happen.  I am just frustrated and sorrowful beyond all expectations.  I’m looking forward to that joy thing.

Jesus SmilingThese things I have spoken to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.”    John 16:33

I definitely needed that reminder.  I also need a break from the world, just as Jesus headed off across the lake once or twice to get away.  My batteries are getting low.  It’s getting to the point where I’m getting afraid to go outside.  There was a shooting last night in Memphis over road rage.  One in the hospital, one in jail.  The way some people drive can be lethal to others, so I understand pulling a gun.  I DON’T agree with it or condone it, but I understand it.

that you may become blameless and harmless, children of God without fault in the midst of a crooked and perverse generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world    Philippians 2:15

I’m feeling like the dimmest bulb in the pack right about now.  I don’t want to answer any more emails or phone calls from customers demanding things they don’t deserve.  I don’t want to go out into traffic and risk getting run over or shot at.  I’m about sick of being a light in such a messed up world right now.  When I’m jeered and abused for trying to do things that are moral and just, it gets hard to take.

I need a break.  I need a recharge; church, friends,…anything or anyone who is also a friend of Christ.

That’s enough of that. So I either have been sounding pathetic or I’ve done you a service by letting you know you’re not the only one who’s tired of how crazy things have gotten.

One good point: if I’m upset over all of this, I guess it means I’m still on the right side.