Men Are Pigs

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, 26 that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, 27 that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish. 28 So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church.    Ephesians 5:25-29

First, let me point out that these verses follow the often-maligned section about wives being submissive to their husbands.  The implication of the entire message is that, as Christ has done for us, the husband first should care for his wife with a sacrificial love.  The wife’s response should be submission in gratitude just as Christians – His churchly bride – submit themselves to Christ as a loving response to His sacrifice.

Men today just don’t get it anymore.  By and large, men are pigs.  I’ve watched it happening for decades first with my sisters and now with my daughters.  Not that I’m giving women everywhere a pass, because we’ve all seen our share of Bridezillas.  But today I’m taking aim at the guys, because that is where St. Paul tells us it starts.

My wife and I still hear horror stories from young friends that simply confirm what my girls have gone through.

People are meeting their future (temporary) spouses in bars instead of churches.  Although I sometimes wonder about the guys I sometimes see at church.  Years ago, I saw a mother dragging her kids into church as she held an armload of coats while her husband walked in front of her, completely oblivious and hands-free.  Without saying anything and just smiling, I took the coats from her while she got her kids to stand still for a moment.

“You can always count on someone else’s husband,” was her rueful comment.

Still, if everyone came to church and really listened and had ministers that preached pure, fearless truths from Scripture, many problems would be solved.

A recent conversation with a young thirty-something revealed what at least she and her friends are talking about; maybe it’s better for women to simply co-habit as roommates for their home situation instead of either being alone or trapped with a pig.  It begs the question – for me at least – how many women decide to “become” lesbians, because they simply can’t find men worth the hassle!

Again, I’m not giving women a complete pass, but my perspective is that of a both a literal father and an “honorary” father to a few.  As said above, Bridezillas abound.

Jesus’ selfless love is the only model for men and women to have when it comes to both friendships and marriages.  If men practice a selfless love to their girlfriends and wives, if women practiced the same in response to their men, who knows how well things might start going?

Have you ever read anything about exactly what happens to someone crucified?  It’s horrific!  The Roman soldiers used to laugh about the crucifixion “dance” of their victims.  Hanging by their arms makes breathing next to impossible.  The only way to get a breath is to push up with the feet that have been nailed to a small step, which had to be agonizing.  They had usually been flogged first, with chunks of flesh ripped from their backs.  This means that those deep, open wounds were constantly abraded by the rough, wooden cross…possibly, likely down to the bone!

Jesus endured that for us, and that wasn’t the least of it!  How can we not give at least an ashamed if not loving response to that sort of sacrifice?  How can a spouse not give a loving response to someone who practices even a fraction of that sort of selfless love?

Until people start paying attention to God and His ways, many men will continue as pigs and many women will continue as bridezillas long after the wedding!

More Weasel Words & Wiggle Room

[ Principles of Marriage ] Now concerning the things of which you wrote to me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman. Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband. Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband.    1 Corinthians 7:1-3

A recent headline reads Controversial study claims monogamy may NOT be the best approach for human relationships and is based on ‘flawed science.’

I’ve mentioned the importance of language in previous articles about euthanasia and abortion.  People who support legalized murder cover that stance with softer-sounding words like “Women’s Health Care,” “Medical Procedure,” or “Death with Dignity” to name a few.  Most recently was Told You So.  A woman who was suffering from dementia was killed by the attending physician while the family held her down for the shot!

What we’ve got here is failure to communicate.

Behavioural scientists at the University of Michigan now make the claim that “…monogamy may NOT be the best approach for human relationships and is based on ‘flawed science’.”

They conducted a study of 617 people in “consensual non-monogamous” relationships, and discovered that measurements of trust, jealousy, passion, and overall satisfaction indicated no difference in that lifestyle as opposed to monogamous relationships.

“8 out of 10 adulterers agree…”

When they both reviewed past research and ran their own current interviews, they concluded that earlier studies were flawed due to language.  They say that earlier researchers skewed the study with loaded language: cheating, betrayal, infidelity, and the like.

“Sweetheart!  I apologize for being so upset with you!  Here I thought you were f***ing my best friend, betraying the trust of our marriage.  Now I understand it wasn’t that at all.  John was just helping you to unilaterally experiment with a polyamorous lifestyle.  Can you ever forgive me?”

And those comducting past research were absolutely right!  When one spouse cheats on the other, we call it that because that’s largely how people feel!  CHEATED!!

When you call it what it is, people can give an honest response.  When you slather someone with syllables, they can’t see the question for the bubbles and will agree to the most ridiculous things.

I saw a video of a man testing for stupidity among the general population by trying to get signatures to ban dihydrogen monoxide, because “It’s in all of our lakes, rivers, and reservoirs all over the country.  Did you know XX number of people died last year from ingesting too much of it??”

One idiot after another signed.  Why?  They had no clue that dihydrogen monoxide is H2o; water.  Not knowing, they were too stupid to ask.  And of course water is lethal if you ingest too much.  We usually call it “drowning.”

That’s the game these researchers were playing.  They were skewing the surveys themselves by hiding behind technical language, and accusing others of clouding the issue with clear language.  They needed to remove the natural sense of guilt that people feel when they sin in order to promote their secular agenda, namely the erosion and eventual destruction of the family.

Woe to those who call evil good, and good evil; Who put darkness for light, and light for darkness; Who put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter!    Isaiah 5:20

We don’t need a survey from any university to tell us how relationships do and don’t work.  We have God’s Word.  God describes how a family operates and the roles that each member fills.  It is a social structure He created, and it has worked admirably since Creation!

The only time it doesn’t work is when someone ”…unilaterally experiments with a polyamorous lifestyle.”  Murder, duals, divorce…all sorts of violence rises from the tinder of cheating/adultery/infidelity.

Science, which is testing and observing, proves that God’s way is the right way!  Observation of history, current affairs, and the divorce courts show us how costly it is to live otherwise.  Rome was a cesspool of debauchery when it fell, because God’s social system had been abandoned.

Don’t you believe it whenever you hear someone says their study proves that anything is right when God says it’s wrong!  You’ll see a healthy slathering of syllables in there to cloud the issue!

Wedding Anniversary #36

Though one may be overpowered by another, two can withstand him. And a threefold cord is not quickly broken.    Ecclesiastes 4:12

Yes, I’m a day early with a mid-week article, but today is Julie’s and my 36th wedding anniversary!

My feelings for Julie are as strong as ever.  They have grown and changed over the years into something deeper and calmer.  Time is what I most value in our marriage.  There are the times that have passed that are filled with such great and funny memories as well as trials and genuine fear.

Time not yet spent with her is a treasure I look forward to.  I miss her every time I’m away from home for work and all those quiet moments of just being together.  I yearn for shared meals at our favorite restaurants.  There’s the sheer pleasure of being able to make her laugh and watching her eyes light up.  There’s the incomparable comfort of lying next to her in warmth and peace.

Through it all has been love.  True love.  We’ve lasted this long, because we know that love is more than mere, fleeting emotion.  Love is what God has shown us.  Love is choice!

God chose to stay with humanity after The Fall.  Jesus chose to stay on the cross in the midst of His agony.  God chooses time and again to listen to our constant sorrow over having sinned yet again.  He chooses!

Julie and I aren’t celebrating 36 years of marriage, because the emotions are so pure and strong.  We have lasted this long, because emotions aren’t enough.  Emotions can betray and hurt us.  Only one thing lasts this long; choice!

We didn’t choose to be together for life just on our wedding day.  We choose each other daily.  Sometimes the choice is easy.  Sometimes it’s hard.  I just thank God that He taught us what true love is and has given us the faith and ability to always choose each other.

Julie – thank you for always choosing me…even when I’m not very “choosable.”  Thank you for always being my Jewel.  Thank you for 36 years!!

Click on the like below to hear the song that I wrote with my best friend and best man.  I wrote the lyrics to “She’s my Jewel”, and Rick wrote the music, arrangements, and played all the parts on a synthesizer as well as singing it for me.  After all, he did attend The New England conservatory majoring in voice!  We played the studio recording at the wedding reception for the first time on a professional Bose system.  The evening’s success was measured in running mascara – hers and every other woman’s there!